Happy Holidays

Its that time of year again! I know I'm not the only person who likes to get a pile of books to read over vacation so heres my list of top picks for the holidays!

1) The Vampire Academy Series by Richelle Mead

2) The Mortal Instruments Series by Cassandra Clare

3) The Private Series by Kate Brian

4) The Fallen Series by Lauren Kate

Time: Dont Waste It

"The problem with time, I've learned, whether it's those first two weeks I got to spend with you, or the final two months I got to spend with him, eventually time always runs out." -Dear John

One of the worst feelings in the world is when you realize you've wasted time, when you realize that time has run out entirely and you can’t get it back. I have more than enough experience with this feeling. Don’t ever take anyone around you for granted because someday they might be gone. Gone forever. Although scientists have come up with some amazing things, they have yet to invent a way to make time go backwards. You end up stuck with the mistakes you've made. The only thing I regret- the only thing I would go back and change if I could- is not spending enough time with my aunt before she died. Don’t waste time. Your going to make mistakes in your life, but don’t let wasting time be one of them.

"eventually time always runs out"

Wow.

Wow. I should have performed at Coffeehouse a LOT sooner.

Coffeehouse

"Something has changed within me. Something is not the same. I'm through with playing by the rules of someone else's game. Too late for second-guessing. Too late to go back to sleep. It's time to trust my instincts, close my eyes: and leap!" - Defying Gravity from WICKED

These are the words that have been guiding me through this week. As some of you may already know, I'm performing at coffeehouse this Friday. It might come as a shock to some of you that this is my first time performing and I get nervous just thinking about it. For a while, I have sat back at the coffeehouses' and said, "I'm going to perform up there someday". Then each month would come and go, and I still hadn’t performed.

One saying that I heard repeatedly all my life is "why wait until tomorrow to do something u can do today". Although this usually referred to homework or cleaning my room, I feel that it works with this situation as well. So I'm going to do it. As the lyrics say- It's time to trust my instincts, close my eyes and leap! I'm going to perform. Wish me luck!

(For those of you who want to go, coffeehouse is this Friday in the NAHS caf at 7:00pm. check out this facebook link- http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#!/event.php?eid=173352132676384)

Mom's Notes (Day 7)

"Day 7-

You know you're a techie when...
- You have a permanent mark above your ears from the headset.
- You wave at little kids from the lighting booth! (Absolutely)
- You prefer the lighting board over your girl/boyfriend. (I would never admit it)
- You walk into your home and your parents ask who you are.
- You memorize gel colors for fun! (Sadly I do)
- You are more concerned about the location of your adjustable crescent wrench than you are about your car keys.
- Your parents memorize the stage phone number. (They should)
- You really believe that wearing all black makes you invisible! (This is worded as if insinuating that black doesn’t make you invisible... That is offensive. It DOES make you invisible...)
- You dress your snowman in black.
- You use glow tape instead of night lights to find your way around your home at night. (I haven't, but I think I will now.)


"You're not officially a techie until you hurt yourself building the set.""

Thanks, Mom, for the awesome messages!

(My comments are in parenthesis and the ones with the exclamation marks are ones that are extremely true.)

Mom's Notes (Day 5)

For those of you who read my last blog post, here is one of the quotes my mom gave me.

"Day 5-

Tech Week- The last week of rehearsal when everything that was supposed to be done weeks before finally comes together at the last minute; reaches itsgrand climax on final dress rehearsal night when costumes rip, a dimmer patch catches fire and the director has a mental breakdown"

SO TRUE.

Memories

When I was little, if my parents were going away, they would leave 2 Hersey kisses for each day (one for the morning and one for the night to symbolize a good morning/night kiss). Recently, this came up in conversation, since they were leaving for Hawaii soon. My mom was amazed that I remembered and she saw how much that truly meant to me.

My parents are leaving tomorrow and my mom just walked into the room with a stack of papers for me. Sure enough, each paper had 2 of my favorite candies and a message. So sticking to tradition, I'm not going to eat the candy or read the notes until the day they are assigned. Thanks mom, it means a lot to me.

Halo by Alexandra Adornetto

Last night, I started reading a new book called 'Halo'. One paragraph caught my eye and really made me think.

"One of the most frustrating words in the human language, as far as I could tell, was love. So much meaning attached to this one little word. People bandied it about freely, using it to describe their attachments to possessions, pets, vacation destinations, and favorite foods. In the same breath, they then applied this word to a person they considered most important in their lives. Wasn't that insulting? Shouldn't there be some other term to describe deeper emotion?"

Only twelve pages in and the author has already gained my respect. I've never even thought about that concept.

If Your Reading This

It's not very often that a song has the power to move me to tears. When a song like that does come around, I make sure I tell every one I know about it. I just recently heard the song "If Your Reading This" by Tim McGraw and I would like my readers to go listen to this song.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k1STL6E0AIk

Live In The Moment

Have you ever stopped what you're doing and taken a moment to observe what's going on around you?

Throughout the summer, I felt out of my element. I missed being with my theatre friends 24/7. So when I sat to watch the theatre auditions for 'My Sister Eileen' today, I was in the highest of spirits. I have to admit- I'm most content when I'm in our school theatre, while surrounded by the friends I call my family. It's the one time I'll never feel out of place.

I often blog about my struggles with living in the moment. Today, that didn't seem like a problem for me. As I sat in the theatre this afternoon, I looked around at all the smiling faces -- the faces I missed over the summer -- and I was overcome with peace. This is where I feel comfortable. This is where I belong.

I try to stop what I'm doing every now and then to capture a memory and really enjoy it. I would like my readers to try this as well. Next time your in your element, I want you to stop and really take a look around.

Capture a memory, feed off the energies, enjoy it.

Just A Thought

Just a thought to share with readers and bloggers:

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." -Mark Twain

Have a great week!!

Plans

I have the type of personality where I need to have everything planned. For the longest time I lived by the quote, "Failing to plan is planning to fail". It seemed like a logical concept- if you plan everything, you'll succeed.

As long as I can remember, I have been mapping out my entire life. My college, my wedding, my job. The list goes on. Up until recently, I could have probably told you my entire future if it went as planned, but that's exactly the point. Things never go as planned.

So I'm now trying to change my ways. I'm living by a new quote- "Expect the best, plan for the worst, and prepare to be surprised." At least I'm going to try. After all, old habits die hard.

Quotes That I Know To Be True

"Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent" - Eleanor Roosevelt

"Whether you think you can or you think you can't- you are right" - Henry Ford

"Confidence comes not from always being right but from not fearing to be wrong" - Peter T. Mcintyre

"Our doubts are traitors, and make us lose the good we oft might win, by fearing to attempt" - William Shakespeare

"Dream as if you'll live forever, live as if you'll die today" - James Dean

Fear

Franklin D. Roosevelt once said, "the only thing we have to fear is fear itself". I have learned all too well that he was right. Everybody is scared of atleast one thing in their life. With time and exploration, we usually find that our fears were silly.

I am scared of snakes, any kind of bug, fire and heights. Those are just the major ones. But most importantly, for the last few months and especially the last week, i have been terrified out of my mind to get my wisdom teeth out. Everybody insisted that i would be fine and that it would be easy. Lets just say- I didnt believe them.

I've been worried about this for months. Silently panicing inside, asking every possible question to reassure myself when, as all of you predicted, it didnt work. All the extra mental preparation and over thinking just made me freak out even more. I was making it worse and i didnt even know i was.

So you'd think with all this planning that i would have something good to show for it, right? Wrong again. Do you want to know what happened? I had a mental break down in the office before they put me to sleep. So much for 'mental preparation'. And now I'm sitting at home a bit swollen and sore but otherwise content thinking about the past months and practically laughing at myself for how silly i behaved. I'm fine, the surgery went fine- just like everybody told me. I'm almost possitive that if i just let go of that fear months ago, realized that its going to happen whether i like it or not, and i'll be fine; ya know what? I would have been just that: fine.

So take Franklin D Roosevelts' advice- "the only thing you have to fear is fear itself". Because he really knew what he was talking about.

Cherish Your Adolescence

I was looking through bumper stickers on facebook today and I saw one that really stood out. It said, 'sometimes I wish I was six and my biggest problem was what dress to wear'. Although its a very popular saying that I have heard many times, for some reason it striked me differently this time.

When your six years old; you have to decide what you should build with your blocks, how to assemble a fort in your room, and which cookie to eat. When your in high school; you have to figure out who your going to sit with at lunch, how to strike up a conversation with the guy you like, and how to juggle all the different parts to your life (school, sports, clubs, etc). But when you get even older, your problems get more serious; you have to figure out how to take care of your children, how to keep food on the table, and how to juggle all the problems that come with living on your own.

I walk around constantly thinking about my future, trying to plan it out. When I was in middle school, I wanted to be in high school. Now that I'm in high school, I'm thinking about college. I'm sure I wont appriciate college when that comes around either. Why do I do this? I dont really know. I have trouble living in the present. But since more years bring more problems, why not cherish our adolescence? Because they always say that it goes faster than you think.

So whatever your doing today- whether its sitting on the couch watching television, going to a concert, or hanging with your friends- make sure you enjoy it. Appriciate it, instead of thinking about what will happen tomorrow.

He's Just Not That Into You

"Girls are taught a lot of stuff growing up; if a boy punches you he likes you, never try to trim your own bangs and someday you will meet a wonderful guy and get your very own happy ending. Every movie we see, every story we're told implores us to wait for it: the third act twist, the unexpected declaration of love, the exception to the rule. But sometimes we're so focused on finding our happy ending that we dont learn to read the signs. How to tell the ones who want us from the ones that dont, the ones who will stay and the ones who will leave. And maybe a happy ending doesnt include a guy, maybe its you, on your own, picking up the peices and starting over, freeing yourself up for something better in the future. Maybe the happy ending is just moving on. Or maybe the happy ending is this: knowing after all the unreturned phone calls and broken hearts, through the blunders and misread signals, through all the pain and embarrasment.... you never gave up hope"

- He's Just Not That Into You

The meaning of life

"Laugh as much as you breathe and love as much as you live"

People search their whole lives trying to find the meaning of life. Others search for their purpose in life. They search and search and they sometimes come up with moderately good answers. But until we meet our maker at the pearly gates, how will we ever know whether those guesses are right? The meaning of life has posed a strong debate to people for decades, even centuries. So i'm going to tell you my opinion:

I, personally, believe that everything has a meaning or purpose, but why should we try to figure it out? Why ruin the surprise? Why make the moment of ' oh, i understand now!' less satisfying or unforeseen? Some people spend more time trying to find the meaning of life than actually living it. Now, im not saying that we shouldnt care or that we should let loose and be terrors to the world. Still be the best you can be. But im going to let god do his magic and i'm going to be surprised. I'm going to make mistakes and learn from them. I'm going to forgive and hope to be forgiven. I'm going to enjoy my time on this amazing planet. So that when the meaning is revealed, i will appriciate it.

For those of you that want an answer now, i'm going to tell you that it wont be easy to find. Good luck and please let me know if you do. But for now, until i get a better answer, i'll say its this:

live, love, laugh, learn, and have fun

It may seem cliche but the most true things in life are. So go out there, live life right, make it worth the experience because you only live once.

Curiosity

I woke up this morning, pulled up the shades, and looked at the clear blue sky outside my window. As i was looking, i remembered that the sky wasn't actually blue, but instead, it is a reflection of the ocean. That really made me wonder; why did i know that the sky wasn't blue? I knew this because when i was little, i always asked questions, i was always curious. Curious about how the leaves change color in the fall, why there are waves in the ocean, why the grass was green, why the sky is blue, etc.

My parents and teachers would scramble to answer my questions in the simplest yet most accurate ways. So your probably wondering where im going with this, right? Well, my point is that i remembered. Almost everything i know about this world, i've learned from asking questions. Curiosity may have killed the cat, but curiosity also kills ignorance. Yes, you could argue that ignorance is bliss, but is it really? Its just as enjoyable to learn and get answers.

Because then, when your curious child asks you why the leaves change color in the fall you can say, ' the leaves color because of the cooler temperature'. When someone asks you why there are waves in the ocean you can say, ' the moon pulls the water with gravity'. When your new baby cousin asks you why grass is green you can say 'because all colors except green is absorbed into the chlorophyl in the plant'. When a child just like you asks why the sky is blue you can happily give them the answer that you heard at their age. Wisdom gets passed down.

So heres my homework for you- ask questions, be sceptical, be curious.